Parents often step in right away when children forget lunch or cannot solve a math problem.

But developmental experts and educators say children need chances to struggle with everyday problems.

Figuring things out is a skill that must be practiced.

The challenge for parents is knowing when to help and when to step back.

Dr. Dana Suskind, a University of Chicago professor, said the most important thing parents can give children is not the answer.

Instead, it is the experience of figuring it out.

Dr. Stephanie Carlson of the University of Minnesota said children who rarely struggle can feel severe anxiety.

This can happen when they must solve something alone.

Experts say parents should step in during real danger.

However, they should slow down when the stakes are lower.

They can ask open-ended questions, such as what a child thinks or what else they could try.

Allowing children to feel bored, frustrated or nervous can support their learning.

Independence looks different at each age.

Nicole Knoth of Flagstaff, Arizona, gave her daughters small decisions when they were young.

Jemia Cunningham-Elder of Chicago watches what each of her four daughters can handle.

Then she gives them a little more freedom.

Experts also say independence does not mean doing everything alone.

Asking a teacher for help is part of it too.