Parents often help right away.

A child forgets lunch.

A child cannot do math.

Parents solve it fast.

But experts say children need to try alone.

Figuring things out is a skill.

Children must practice this skill.

Parents must know when to help.

They must know when to step back.

Dr. Dana Suskind is a professor at the University of Chicago.

She said the answer is not the most important thing.

The experience is the most important thing.

Dr. Stephanie Carlson is from the University of Minnesota.

She said some children rarely struggle.

These children can feel very scared.

They feel scared when they must solve something alone.

Experts say parents should help in real danger.

But they should slow down for small problems.

Parents can ask open questions.

They can ask what a child thinks.

They can ask what else a child can try.

Children can feel bored.

Children can feel upset.

Children can feel nervous.

This can help them learn.

Independence looks different at each age.

Nicole Knoth is from Flagstaff, Arizona.

She gave her daughters small choices.

They were young then.

Jemia Cunningham-Elder is from Chicago.

She has four daughters.

She watches what each daughter can do.

Then she gives them a little more freedom.

Experts also say this: independence is not doing everything alone.

Asking a teacher for help is part of it too.